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"Sorry"


I have always felt that as Canadians we use the word, "sorry" in excess. But it was during my recent shopping trip to Giant Tiger that I thought, we apologize for things way more than we need to. The store is very tight with lots of merchandise, meeting another cart means you must maneuver to get around each other. All, I could hear was a steady stream of "Sorry" as we all tried to get out of each other's way. Saying "sorry", just flies out of our mouths especially when we are in each other's space. It is more of a way of being polite than being sorry, because that is what we do in Canada.  

This is a perfect example of how apologetic we are. I was out walking when I saw a woman backing out of her driveway. She was looking the other way and just kept on backing up. She never looked my way, so I just waited for her to back up. When she turned and saw me waiting for her, she went into a state of shock and mouthed "I'm sorry" many times. She quickly pulled back up in her driveway so I could go by, even though I waved her on. She remained in a state of disbelief, clearly, she thought she had nearly run over me. I cleared the driveway, she backed out and once on the road she rolled down her window, to apologize one more time. She was truly sorry.  

Did you realize we say "sorry" like "sore-ee". We emphasize "sore" in sorry. Women say "sorry" more than men. In Canada saying, "I'm sorry" is known as reflexive courtesy. There are a few theories as to why Canadians apologize so quickly and so often. One is we inherited an awkwardness as a byproduct of British settlement. Canadian identity has a looseness to it. Saying "I'm sorry" is a quick way to dodge conflict. Being quick to apologize and minimize conflict is a strategy best employed by people working to make their own situation as pleasant as possible. Historically, Canada has been recognized as a nation of kindness, empathy and apologizing for their mistakes.   

In the U.S. issuing an apology is often framed as an admission of inadequacy, weakness or quilt. In Canada we introduced "The Apology Act" in 2009. It was developed to give lawyers a fair chance of defending clients who were never guilty but apologized to the aggrieved all the same.

We should be proud to be known around the world as a polite country. Right now, we are fighting back and maybe not as polite as we used to be. By wearing a Canadian flag pin, saying "sorry" and "eh", it makes it clear to everyone, you are dealing with someone from Canada. Who would ever want it any other way?



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