Mentally Tough

When I was writing the "Unstoppable" blog, I got caught up on what it means to be tough; as a woman. In that blog I said I was life tough, I now realize that is better described as mentally tough or mentally strong. If you describe yourself as a tough woman in any sort, from any experience, be proud of it. Becoming mentally strong takes some time, and sadly is often caused by life experiences. But, once you are there, you handle situations in a similar manner every time. Mentally strong women come in a variety of shapes and sizes. Their personality doesn't have to be aggressive, just a strong female in her own right.  

In Jordin Tootoo's book he wrote that his brother was mentally tough. His brother would often say that it is all about mind over matter. Since our minds are one of the most powerful things we own, we must really use it to make sense of our lives. 

I have heard this said before and I believe it, "we all fight a fight no one knows about". There are some people that are what is referred to as, an open book. They share everything about their lives, or so it seems. I am inclined to think that is not the norm. I feel we all have something that is very personal to us, only shared with a few people or no one at all. I learned a long time ago; you don't have to share everything about yourself. It is your story to tell.

I am sure there are people that say they haven't, had a battle in their life. If they haven't they will. In my mind, every adult has battled one or more of the following; health issues, difficult relationships, financial problems, addiction or just plain hardships for a variety of reasons such as loss. During these experiences, mentally tough people do things that set them apart from others. They believe the situation will take time to resolve and they are willing to give the situation time. Once a person becomes mentally tough, they stop feeling sorry for themselves. They stop dwelling on the past and they move forward. By letting go of the situation, and making sense of it, it makes you mentally strong. 

I realized I fell into the category of a mentally tough person when I read the following descriptors. Mentally tough people like to journal and write things they are grateful for. They always make goals for themselves; and they take time to do self-reflection. Mentally tough people are those people with the ideas. They also know how to make their ideas develop. They never assume others are going to do it for them. They know people, who know people, who will help them to be successful. They aren't afraid to ask people for help. They honor other's successes. A mentally tough person is known to do one tough thing each day. Lastly, they don't waste energy on things they can't control.   

Mentally tough people are okay with being alone, knowing no one, or entering a room full of people and finding a place of comfort. They have an understanding that the world owes them nothing and that no job is above them. If needed, they will try and try again until they get it. 

Not every woman has to be mentally tough, everyone has their own strengths. To be mentally tough you don't have to have all the characteristics I identified. That would almost be a frightening person. Like Jordan's brother there are mentally tough men, I assume their characteristics would be similar, but to be honest I'm not sure. 

A woman becomes mentally tough either through life situations, or just not liking a weakness in herself and adapting another way to live. I personally, like all the descriptors I have listed and on any given day, I think I exhibit many of them. I feel a person only has to be as tough as their lives dictate. Whether you deem yourself mentally tough or not, you are who you are. I personally can't imagine living any other way. There will be many of you reading this who will think, "I can't imagine living like that". It makes me realize that living the way we want is the best. If you feel you would like to be a bit stronger or tougher you might grab on to a couple of things I've written about. There are lots of options in life.