No Excuses

          

Once upon a time, when I would introduce myself to a new student group, I would say, "I don't do excuses". I always included myself in my rules, which meant I would not allow excuses into my life. I found it to be a much purer and honest way for me to live. My responsibility was to be part of the development of a professional person and as a professional you should be better than an excuse.   

                                     

I was having lunch with a friend and as I was sharing a story, out of her mouth came "I bet you said, I don't do excuses". I was a wee taken aback as she went on to say, "I tell people that you don't do excuses". It was at that very moment I thought to myself, "what has happened to you?". I was just going to embark on an excused filled story of the way I live my current life. This was a moment where time just stood still and I thought, thank goodness we have friends that get us back on track. I have become quite good at saying, "well I am a senior now" or "I am not as dependable as I used to be" or whatever EXCUSE I came up with at the time. I even have a pat line which is, "well that's the excuse I am using for today". 

I have started to use the excuses: "I can't believe it, but I forgot" or "I got that mixed up". These are true statements; I did forget, or I did get mixed up. They are also statements that are acceptable, but I have decided they are not acceptable for me. I need to go that extra mile to make sure I don't forget. I have a calendar, I write every commitment on it, so I need to check it more often. The "I got that mixed up" is going to take more work. I find I am not paying attention like I used to. That is a fact, not an excuse. More re-reading of my texts or notes I have made to myself or simply just focus. When I worked, I had to stay focused, which was good for me and achievable. Currently, there are no demands on my focus, and being focused now only comes in waves.  

I have done considerable reflecting on the conversation I had with my friend. I was thinking, did I jeopardize my integrity? I knew that I needed to buck up and go back to, I don't do excuses. Committing to the gym and getting my tattoo was something that came from this conversation. I was just letting excuses feed into my world of not committing and I didn't like that about myself. I am better than that. 

We all have things in our lives we need to change. Some people address it and make it happen. Others simply don't. I am not sure if the reasons are because they are nervous, or they don't want to invest in the work involved or maybe they are just afraid of failure.  For me once I switched the switch on what I was going to do, besides knitting, life took on a whole new meaning. It also created a sense of calmness within me. I have always said, just make a decision, do not overthink it or change it until you try it. Give it an honest effort and make it work. It may not work out like you thought, but it will work out. 

I have always been the type of person, if I say I am going to do it, I do it. Commitment is something I have always stayed true to. I never send a text to anyone, saying, "are we still on?". I just assume the commitments are coming back to me in the same way. I have friends that are committed like I am. I also have people in my life that I know will cancel. It used to bother me when someone cancelled, but not anymore.  

I think we can all think of someone that is "going" to do something. I have been that person, so I feel knowledgeable to write this. They talk the talk, but they don't walk the walk. They have a list a mile long for not doing it, or I guess excuses is the word I should use. Life is busy for so many, and we feed into that. In fact, I think some people get lost in it. It becomes the excuse book of life for them. From my recent experience, dealing with a commitment face on, I found it to be releasing. Living in the world of excuses or indecision is spiraling. Sit back and think to yourself. Have I committed like I should to my life? Am I one of those people that have pat excuses? Do I need to use more statements that are facts to identify my behavior rather than an excuse? Take yourself on and say, "I am better than this, moving forward I am going to not rely on excuses!". Think of yourself as that person if you say you are going to do it, you do!