The Lost Arts

I have now become a daytime TV watcher, or should I say more of a TV listener.  Twice in one day I heard the talk show hosts say, "it's a lost art". Is it a lost art or is it better defined as, "things we used to do".  Maybe, in today's world the following lost arts aren't deemed necessary.  

                                         

Let's start with the simple act of a "Thank you" for a gift or an act of kindness.  The way I look at it is: if I do something for someone it is not to receive a Thank-you, I did it because I wanted to.  If I receive a Thank you, that's bonus.  I always extend a thank-you when I am on the receiving end of someone's kindness. To me it is just wrong not to show them how much it meant to me. But, if I give a gift for a special occasion, I do expect a response of some sort.  We all remember writing out individual thank you cards for gifts we received at our shower, wedding, for each baby and the list goes on.  Now, if a thank you is sent it is usually a picture collage with the message already written on it. I really enjoy the pictures, and this is the new age handmade card. The bonus here is if there is a personalized handwritten message on the back of the picture. 

Some parents are just amazing to make sure their children are thankful and what a great practice to teach and emulate.  I hope parents realize how important it is to demonstrate how to say thank you for the littlest of things. 

                                    

Let's move on to manners.  Oh, my goodness, when I hear a child using their manners, it just warms my heart.  Once again this is a learned behavior and watching manners is the best teaching tools. I like to have a door held open for me, and I like to hold a door open for others.  But, to have someone walk through and not acknowledge my action, does not sit well. I always use my manners at that time and say, "you're welcome".  

                                        

I am so hot and cold with this one. I am trying to make a point of sending a "text" message to a friend after I have enjoyed some special time with them. I am finding I am often too slow at doing it, and they often beat me to it. A sweet little message of reflection from a friend, certainly makes me feel grateful for having them in my life. When I was in business, it meant so much to me, to have a client send a text and tell me how much better they felt, any comments were so meaningful and encouraging. If everyone practiced this more, wouldn't we all feel so much better, it takes only a few seconds. 

                                   

The talk show hosts were talking about how phoning someone is a lost art. I remember when I worked my phone never rang.  Probably because I never phoned anyone, my sole way of communicating was by email.  Presently, my main phone call activity is: to call a place of business to see if they have what I want or to order take out.  I have a list of friends that when the text messages mount, we phone each other. I like to facetime my mom often, which is great way of staying connected with family from afar. When I had my business, I ran it mainly by text messages. I have found I have gotten bad at asking when I get a number if I can text it. With that said, a text is a chain of written information which can be referred to if needed. Which I find is fast becoming an important part of my life.  

                                   

I had to include this. Anyone that uses texting to message others, knows exactly how true this statement is.  Some people can express themselves perfectly and others, leave you feeling that you must of upset them. It seems an immediate response to a text is what is expected and if it doesn't happen, we insert craziness. Things like they must be mad or upset about something I did or said, start to pop into your head.  What else could it possible be? It could possibly be the phone was being charged, they had taken a timeout from their phone, the message got lost in the other texts, they wrote it but forgot to send it. How do I know this, because this is what I do, all too often. I try to respond in a timely fashion, but sometimes that doesn't happen. 

                             

I never realized how much honesty is a lost art until I read this quote from Mark Twain.  Covid taught us all to lie, we developed reasons why we were out when we weren't supposed to be.  Or to say we were symptom free, when we may not be. It was all about keeping our sanity at that time.  I notice myself saying, "in all honesty", way more than I used to. I guess it is that old lady, "I can say anything I want" attitude. That and I believe we like to share wisdom the older we get. Let's face it we are not out there to hurt others with our honest remarks, but sometimes you just need to say it as it is.  There are people in our lives that need to hear honesty, delivered with love. Men are so much better at being honest than women. Women's feelings get hurt way easier; I know this after working decades in a female dominant profession.                                          

                                        

Oh, my goodness, how can I begin to explain this quote. I have utmost respect for people that are a teacher or going into teaching. I respect anyone going into any of the professions. Those jobs just don't hold the respect they used to. I have no clue what it must take to be a "good" teacher in today's world. Classrooms are full to capacity, children seem to have more learning needs, and there is less EI support. Yet, teachers find the time to send text messages to parents throughout the day. There are good parents and some not so good parents when it comes to supporting the teachers. It seems hard for some parents to accept the fact that it was their child's fault, not someone else. Parents need to be active in their child's education. Working with a teacher for the best outcome will certainly be a win win for the student.   

                                 

I am going to end this post with the lost art of respect.  Where did it go? I understand that things have changed since teachers, police, coaches and other adults were to be respected.  If you got in trouble at school, you were in trouble at home. Being disciplined by other adults meant that you weren't being good, and that meant your parents would hear about it. It used to be "respect your elders". You can't beat an elderly person that has lived a long, hard life to have wisdom to solve any problem. Sadly, as time goes on, there are less people in my world able to share their wisdom with me.  

In all honesty, I feel that the world is lacking respect in all aspects of life. With that said, I feel that respect must be earned. It starts with respecting yourself and works up for there. Respect is yours to have or to lose. It is so simple, use your power to respect others and if you don't know how to do that, watch, listen and  learn. The world needs it, it's the right thing to do.